Our brains represent about 5% of our body mass but consume 20% of our energy. They generate so many thoughts that if these were to accumulate too agressively they would cause a fierce swelling such that our skulls would fracture. Our brains need to constantly divest themselves of this mass. We refer to the smallest invisible unit of this mass as thoughticles.
Thoughticles come in many forms, determined by their vibrational state. Those related to logical and focused thought have the highest vibration, and we refer to them as laseronz. Creative thoughts, and lateral thinking causes us to emit a slightly lower vibrational form of thoughticles called musonz. Musonz are peculiar in that we are always emitting them, but they are often overwhelmed by laseronz. When our body slumbers the vibrational state of these musonz lowers until they transform into dreamonz.
We emit thoughticles in the form of waves, and we refer to this dual nature as wave thoughticle impartiality. Our thouticles can disrupt the thoughticles of others, and vice versa.When our thoughticles are emitted in a wave that runs counter to the waves emitted by others a small component of our thoughticles are dislodged. These dislodged elements are called confusonz. When enough confusonz are present a cascade event can occur.
One of the most common manifestations of a confusonz cascade is termed by medical professionals as a confluence of verbal diarrheoa and mental constipation, sometimes referred to as the “I shichoo notz.” The best cure for the I shichoo notz is to lower the level of confusonz by either removing yourself from the situation, or deploying harkz. Harks are a peculiar particle that are abundant when we listen, and they have the effect of dampening confusonz. When we listen and avoid speaking science has detected twice as many harkz as confusonz. Eventually the confusonz are overwhelmed and a state of equilibrium returns. This homeostatic mechanism is known as the Shuttit Cycle.
The heart is the only organ other than the brain to regulate itself through the emission of particles. These are emitted sometimes because of the activities of the brain, and sometimes in response to the presence of others. When we feel a platonic sense of affection our hearts emit weightless particles referred to as hugz bosonz. When we feel a strong sense of attraction our bodies release particles called hardonz. There are various intermediary particles, but they always resolve into either hugz bosonz or hardonz.
Other parts of our body control the way we function through molecules. When we engage our muscles emit a molecule called n-dolphinz. You may have heard of the runner’s high; this feeling of happiness is a side-effect of the n-dolphinz. The primary role of this molecule is to deliver energy to the muscles, the main by-product is happiness, and a secondary by-product is an affection for marine mammals.
The body is a fascinating machine. Science!
